Reflective Silence - Memoir of an Abandoned Mansion
At what point does a house become a home? Is it simply when we familiarize ourselves with it? Perhaps, but we feel it's more profound than that. We like to think the answer is this - A house becomes a home when we entrust it with enough memories that it knows us as well as we know it.However, this begs another
question - After everyone leaves, and a house no longer has someone
to watch over, does it cease being a home? This question is not so
easily answered. Unless, of course, you've personally spent time in
an old house, especially one that had known generations of families.
If you have, then you know the answer - Once a house becomes a home
it never forgets. Though the structure may slip away over the years,
its anatomy eroding through the seasons until one day crumbing to
dirt and timber, it will remember its purpose until the last wall
falls.
This old manor was once a home. It still is, even
caked in dust and webbing. The humidity of summer made the air within
the mansion uncomfortably hot and still, and as we moved through the
rooms the aroma of water-damaged wood swirled around us. A bitterness
emanating from some unseen rot festering away in the walls. A
terminal cancer. Patches of sunlight entered through tattered
curtains and ripped plastic, illuminating not just the rooms, but
decades of family photos strewn across the floors and tables in
nearly every chamber of the home. The memories of the house,
scattered and out of sequence like the thoughts of a failing mind.
"Look at what I am" ... "at what I had.", it
professes loudly through the debris. Old homes like this one, so full
of relics and personal belongings, are often depicted as haunted. In
truth though, it is the house, itself, which had become a
ghost.
Spider webs hung and billowed from chandeliers and the
corners of furniture. Tiny paw prints tracked across the dusty
floors, beginnings and ending at broken window panes. Long ago, or
maybe not so long ago, a family grew here. Now, these same walls
fester and peel themselves apart. Purposeless. Forgotten. Spiraling
toward an undeniable conclusion.
What a beautiful manor this
must have been, obvious even without the adornments and photographs
that surrounded us, telling their tales of holidays past, birthdays
and family gatherings, children growing up and leaving, only to
return with children of their own. The cycle of life through these
walls was stunning, but at some point that cycle had broken, and
with it so too did the house.
Now, this once-grand estate
slowly disappears, just as its cherished photographs fade from
their paper backings.